24 months ago I made a commitment. To myself, my health and my future.

I chose to use Cannabis only to help manage my Crohn’s disease.

But, what did making this commitment mean? What would I have to change? Am I going to have to tell everyone I know that I use cannabis now? What about my family? My Job?! So many questions and so many reasons to NOT commit kept me from making that final step.

In order to make an educated decision, I had to get those questions answered.

So I took to the internet and began my trip down the rabbit hole of information about Crohn’s disease; searching for traditional treatments for Crohn’s, including biologics and alternative treatments like cannabis. I also read and researched about diet and stress management.

I spent months reading research and articles published on PubMed, I researched both traditional and alternative treatments for Crohn’s, I read personal accounts of people on both traditional treatments and alternative treatments for Crohn’s. I spoke with my GI doctor (Gastroenterologist), my naturopathic and chiropractic doctors…and anyone else who would talk, share, educate me. It was both over whelming and frustrating.

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I realized that whatever I chose, I was going to be a guinea pig…

so I decided I am going to be a guinea pig on my terms and in control. Decision made, I still had a few hurtles to overcome.

What about my Family? My Friends?

At the time I wasn’t living in the ideal situation for focusing on me and my health first, let alone choosing to go with cannabis and alternative treatments.

  • My teenage step son had come to live with us (& parents were not ready for him to know),
  • We were all living with family who were not as comfortable with cannabis as I would have liked,
  • And I had family and friends with kids of all ages whose parents weren’t ready for me to be public.

I had to hide for a long while. Deciding to talk to your family and friends about medicating with Cannabis can seem impossible and scary. We usually fear their reaction, being judged or that they will no longer want to be around us. Talking out those fears and practicing how to address your well-being and health with your family can help. Making a schedule or routine that works around a busy mom/life schedule can be easy, once you learn what methods work best for you. Need help?

What about my Job?

At this point I had lost my job and the ability to work. Since I had not been able to work there was no income on my end and treatments are not covered by insurance. Plus, I was starting the fight for my LTD (Long Term Disability) through the state (part of being a teacher/ state employee) as well as Federal Social Security Disability (part of terms of LTD though the state).

Even though I didn’t have a boss to worry about finding out, there was still the question of how will my cannabis use effect the outcome for both of those? (By the way, all that disability stuff is a whole other can of What The Holy F*ck, that I will share another time).

Do you have a job that has a strict No Drugs policy, or you have fear they may find out and find some “other” reason to fire you? Learning how the HIPPA laws, AMMA (Arizona Medical Marijuana Act) and other laws protect you can help you figure out the best way to handle a situation like that. Need help?

What will change?

Well, now I had lost any resemblance of a life I once knew…
And despite fighting for disability, I was still hoping against hope that in the future I might be able to return to work as a teacher and how would that work if I am a cannabis patient? If I ever were able to return to “work”, what kind of work would I be able to do? This isn’t a short term decision I’ve made, I’m in this for the long haul.

Eventually, I began to accept the fact that this IS my life now. I am not able to return to teaching. There is no job that I can do, let alone teach… now, that was a bitter pill to have to swallow. Only 41 years old; mentally ready to tackle the world, but physically -invisibly-unable. I have had to come to terms with I am dependent on some sort of medicine to live; to get back to any kind of life that did not involve me considering how to make a custom molded toilet seat specifically for my teeny tiny butt.

It’s hard coming to terms with a life you don’t want

It’s hard coming to terms with a life you don’t want, a life that does not fit in with the norm of society…but at some point, I switched my thinking, I began looking at each situation as a puzzle or challenge to resolve, not a road block to a life I wanted.

I was DONE being sick; I was DONE living a life of constant pain and being tethered to my toilet, I was DONE being this person I no longer recognized inside and out. So, I committed to changing it, starting with Cannabis and Wellness.

I still have struggles, my life isn’t perfect by any stretch. It’s a daily, life long commitment. For example, everything in my life takes planning now, spontaneity is not an option whether it is a weekend out of town or a night on the town. I have to plan and figure out all kinds of things ahead of time like the timing of my eating, how long before I leave will I medicate, can I medicate while out? Which will in turn impact when I need a bathroom and then there is how long will I be in the bathroom and/ or how frequently. Are things going well that I can eat anything (within my diet) or are things a little stressed and I need to watch what I eat if I want to leave the house? Will there be a toilet for me to use when I am out? Private or public? Easy access or not? Will I be around people who mind me medicating?

Sure, it seems like a lot to manage, for one night out… but I’m going out. I am living. With Cannabis and with MY decision.

Here’s a video that my Sister in-law and I found very inspiring and really sums up what it means to Commit To Your Health.

What about support?

It’s very difficult to stay focussed on your health when the people you live with do not share the same focus or dedication to their own health, much less yours. It can cause even more stress than you are already under. It can be challenging to stay dedicated, we know. If you’re in a situation like this, you may want to try finding a routine like I discussed last month. My daily and weekly routines with yoga, meditation and reiki help me keep my focus on my health. Or find a support partner who will help you stay on track. Need help?

So, what are you struggling with? What are YOUR commitment issues?

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We hear from so many women “I know Cannabis can help improve my way of life, but…”

Don’t let the fear of the unknown talk you out of committing to your health. We have developed an environment to help guide you through these issues, answer questions, solve problems and give you the encouragement you need to take control of your health.

Mutherlyluv Cannaguides has been created to help those who want to learn more about Cannabis, it’s benefits, how it can be applied to day to day life and to guide them through whatever is holding them back from making that commitment to their health.

It doesn’t matter if you are a seasoned “stoner” from the good ole days, or a bright and shiny New-Comer to the modern era of Cannabis, we will be here to help guide you on your journey.

What is a Cannaguide?

We are people who care deeply about helping other people find happiness, health and comfort with Cannabis and Wellness. We will get to know you, what you want to achieve, where you are at right now in your journey and we will help you find the best way to make Cannabis and Wellness work for you, as an individual. We can be there for every step of your journey, or just when you need us. Cannaguides provide education, support, guidance and friendship… we’re not doctors, we just play one on TV.

Who are we?

Head on over to Mutherlyluv and have a look. We are two sisters who want to help. Are you ready?

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